While I was away with extra time in a space of nature bursting with the wonder of Spring, I mused on the new life I had experienced recently. One new life is this blog and I was thinking about it's URL thankyoumagic and I realized that contrary to how I usually operate I had not looked up the definition of magic before using it in such a public way. Producing surprising results was one definition I found when I picked up the dictionary that always sits next to my chair. Miraculous, enchantment and wonder were synonyms of magic.
Yep, I thought, thank you as a way of living has indeed produced magic: surprising results and one of the surprising results has been eyes that are prepared to see the tiny miracles and pieces of enchantment and wonder sprinkled throughout my day.
In some ways I have been living a version of thank you since accepting sobriety into my life thirty some years ago and made the choice to live out of gratitude: an awareness of the goodness in my life. The really big leap though in this way of living is relatively new and occurred a couple years ago when I read these words: All God asks is for you to be open to the 100 blessings placed in your day.
ALL God asks !!!! Those are the words my brain recorded when I read the saying. ALL. How could that be? I have lived a good deal of my life quite aware of the lists of dos and do nots that are supposed to compose the fence line of God and that list contained a whole lot more words than the 17 words in that saying. I found this idea so astonishing that I could no more get away from those words than I could move away from my own shadow and so for days they lived in me: in my mind, my gut, my spirit and even my mouth as I chewed and chewed on them. Finally after living with those words as the main vortex of my thought for what seemed like weeks, I decided that I would try doing what the words suggest: being open.
Open is an interesting word, it means, unobstructed, unenclosed, unconfined. Notice how each of those words begin with the prefix 'un' which means 'not.' And so to be open means to not be obstructed, not be enclosed and not be confined or if you'd like the more positive sounding words: clear, expanded, spacious.
I began to personally understand all those prefixed words when I decided to do what the saying suggested and discovered that in order to live out of the idea of 100 blessings being available for me to see {and therefore experience} I was going to have to get rid of the blinders that prevented me from seeing the blessings.
Blessings is another interesting word and the simplest and truest meaning is: goodness. And so I was being asked to see and experience 100 events of goodness in my day. Lord knows I tried and in trying I discovered that habits are hard to break - mostly because habit simply means that you are good at whatever the habit is. Most of we adults are stuck in a habit of surviving: we do what we need to do in order to survive. It is very, very difficult to be convinced that attitudes contributing to survival might need to be let go of; surrendered. Yet, this is exactly what I discovered as I attempted to find my 100 blessings each day. My habits of survival were encumbering me, enclosing me, confining me and generally, obstructing me. Why? Because survival is all about being aware of how "you" might be hurt, disappointed, betrayed, attacked and/or eaten by wild beasts.
Generally habits of survival are so ingrained in our living by the time we reach mid-adulthood that we are not even aware of what they look like simply because for us, they look normal: sensible and rational - after all, they keep us from being eaten by wild beasts. Science has shown that for most people, 80% of our thoughts are what could be referred to as negative: what we don't have, what irritates us, what someone 'really' means by that remark, how we were just 'dissed' by that person, what event or experience is not meeting our ideals {which we generally just refer to as standards}. The list of negatives also includes; who, what or where is not behaving in the manner we would prescribe as well as the mistake I just made or how I just 'trumped' your behavior. Those are in addition to the 'if onlys' and the 'woulda, shoulda and coulda' that often flit in and out of our consciousness. What I just listed (and probably lots more) are the feelings of experience we are vigilant to in order to 'survive' our day. These are our survival defenses.
What I discovered when I attempted to live out of the idea of finding 100 blessings each day was that if I was going to be open to goodness I would need to significantly lower the percentage of the negative survival attitudes that were taking up my thoughts. One hundred blessings and even 65% negative thought pattern were not a compatible relationship. Getting up in the morning and doing my gratitude list was helpful and without a doubt, oriented at least part of myself toward the blessings but remaining open to seeing the 100 seemed to require something more. So I began to look for things I could say 'thank you' to - out loud. I discovered that saying 'thank you' moved me into a new attitude: appreciation.
Appreciation is grateful recognition. Grateful recognition is the active form of gratitude because to 'recognize' is to both see something for what it is and to acknowledge that you have seen it. So the attitude I tried to take on each morning was appreciation and to take on appreciation, I changed my method of doing a gratitude list. Instead of just 'thinking' about what I was grateful for, as I became aware of the specifics (name, place, feeling, experience) of what I was grateful for: the new day, a good nights sleep, the terrific coffee in my hands, the sound of the birds, the gifts of life I have each day: my children, my family, my friends, the food in my cupboards, my gifts, my creativity and whatever blessings might arrive I began to say individual thank yous for each. I discovered this action primed the pump for discovering the rest of the 100 blessings - bits of goodness - scattered through the next 16 hours.
Now when I remember something I had been about to leave the house without, I say thank you; when I have a new idea, I say thank you; when I notice the thread is about to come out of the eye of the needle and it doesn't because I've noticed it, I say thank you, when I see the trees in bloom and notice their beauty, I say thank you. What I discovered with the action of saying thank you out loud, completely by accident, was that I am not alone in life and I am continually blessed by this presence of Goodness.
As I began to experience this incredible stream in life of goodness and blessing it occurred to me that perhaps I was meant to be one of the 100 blessings in the life of another and so I became more conscious of how I responded to who I met in a day: I tried to smile more, listen better and - on the good days - not judge so quickly. I became more conscious of how I affected life - I 'feel' it when I 'bump up against' the things that enclose me and the obstacles I place in my life as a way to feel secure and safe and this awareness allows me choice in what I will do. What I discovered, quite by accident was that as I practiced 'grateful recognition' by actively saying thank you I was slowly but surely becoming unobstructed, unencumbered and unenclosed and my mind, my heart and my gifts began to expand. Truly there was magic in thank you for it was producing surprising results: wonder was beginning to outweigh fear.
As wonder began to encroach on the fears I had accumulated, creativity began to replace survival and life began to appear more and more like those Spring trees: abloom with new life.
I now honestly believe that ALL God asks is for us to be open to the 100 blessings placed in each day. "Open" means adopting the attitude of willingness to be unencumbered by the shoulds & oughts that enclose our life. "Each day" means that as the sun rises today, I must begin anew to see and recognize the goodness of life. In order to recognize the blessing, I actively participate in this goodness by expressing appreciation. The intention to willingly recognize 100 blessings has expanded my experience of life because I am looking for goodness.
Here's the magic of thank you: when I spend a day looking for 100 blessing: those evidences of goodness and am ready to actively recognize what I have seen with an out-loud thank you, then I am oriented toward the good. I believe this is all God desires: to orient ourselves toward what is good - for in recognizing and accepting the blessing, we may then bless others - and as we receive and give, the stream of blessing - of goodness - is created and renewed in each day. Creation continues through the Spirit using human beings as Its vehicle, which for whatever reason, seems to be the design!
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